Posting about the wedding is one of those things where the more I think about it, the more I want to procrastinate doing it. But I may as well get it over and done with whilst my memory of the day is still relatively fresh…
And so to continue on from my previous post about the mornings gatecrash, it was onwards with the show. Basically after I picked up the bride we all drove off towards the church. The ceremony was to begin at 1pm, and we arrived at the church at 10-10:30am. The reason we planned it this way was so that we could fit in a photo session around the church, plus also a full rehearsal of the ceremony beforehand.
Unfortunately we couldn’t hold a rehearsal any sooner because my groomsmen only arrived 2 days before the wedding, and so this was the only opportunity we had. The moment we all arrived at the church we got down to doing the photoshoot. Kelvin took us around the Chapel to shoot in various spots. It wasn’t the most pleasant of experiences to tell the truth. The shoot that is… not dealing with Kelvin.
The sun was burning down upon us and myself and my groomsmen, all dressed in suits, were sweating like apes. It was fun to begin with, but started to get torturous after a while. The girls were breaking out the blotters whilst the guys were fidgeting with their collars. Eventually we got that over and done with, and moved on into the Church. The bridesmaids and groomsmen could relax just a tad more whilst Erica and I finished off the rest of the photoshoot.
Once that was done, it was time for the rehearsal. Now what transpired here threatened to put a dampener on the day. Basically we were meant to do a full wedding rehearsal, bar the reading of the vows, in the time we had before the start of the ceremony. None of the guests are meant to arrive until the start of the ceremony. It was agreed upon by Ericas parents previously that all the extended family that were at the mornings tea ceremony were not to arrive at the chapel until around 12:30-1pm.
So we were shocked to see everyone marching into the church whilst we were about to begin our rehearsal at 11:30am! Only Ericas dad was meant to arrive because he had to know what his role was in regards to walking his daughter down the aisle. He was meant to arrive alone, not en masse with the entire clan! What had happened was that Ericas mum figured that instead of keeping the entire extended family at the apartments where they may get bored, she may as well take them down to the church so they can occupy themselves and watch the preparations!
Erica tried to talk some sense into her parents when the entire clan arrived, but her parents just kept saying that there was no harm in everyone watching the rehearsal. I mean, to us, what the fuck is the point of them watching the wedding ceremony if they had just had the whole thing spoilt by the rehearsal. Her parents just could not understand that by them having the entire extended family there watching us prepare, was pretty much going to spoil the day for us! Basically it just wouldn’t be special any more when the time came for the ceremony actual!
Erica was starting to get distressed, I was starting to get fucking pissed off. To me, as much as I know they probably didn’t understand where we were coming from, still thought that it was pretty fucking insensitive of them. I mean, this day was about us right? It’s about trying to make it as special as possible for the bride and groom. And here they were, not giving two shits about how they might be ruining the experience for us. Lovely….. I remember walking outside the church and seeing Denise walking away from the church with Erica. I asked someone what was wrong, and they told me that Erica was having a “moment”.
I walked after them and saw that Erica was in tears and that something was really distressing her. I kept my distance and I wasn’t sure if it was her getting cold feet, or something else that might be bothering her. To be on the safe side, I just hovered near by gestured to her when her friends asked me what was wrong. Essentially the whole issue with her stubborn parents just became too much to bear, just too frustrating, that eventually Erica just cracked.
On the plus side though, Ericas dad saw her start crying, and I think only then started to realise how much the whole family thing was affecting her, and got her Mum to take the entire family out of the chapel and on a tour of Chijmes as so to give us time to do the rehearsal. Thank god! That was something that I really appreciated, because as petty as it was, imagine doing your wedding rehearsal in front of like a third of your audience? It just ruins any anticipation of the fairy tale moment.
We managed to get in about 2 solid dry runs before everyone started coming back in. And even then they witnessed a part of the proceedings. Oh well…. no such thing as perfect, but at least better than them watching the whole thing.
Once the rehearsal was all done, we managed to get some time to relax and chat to some family and friends. Just to wind down and anticipate what was soon to be.
From 12:30pm everyone started to finally arrive. Erica and I retreated to the private room behind the church to collect ourselves and prepare for the moment. It was quite nerve wrecking to peek out the door from behind the state, and see the seats all slowly filling up. It was only then that I really started to feel the intensity of the moment. Of what was about to happen. Before that it was all just chores.
Pastor Khian Tan whom was to preside over the wedding sat joined us in the room and said a prayer for us. His words and presence did much to soothe, calm, and reassure us and it was something that I really appreciated. Eventually Kim the wedding planner knocked on the door to advise us that it was time. So we both took a deep breath, gave each other a hug, and left the room via the back door to take up our positions.
I re-entered the church through the side door to join my groomsmen. From here everything just seemed to happen so quickly that reflecting upon it now just seems like a blur. I had butterflies in my stomach, and staring at the entire church was just such a daunting experience. Forcing myself to take deep, slow breaths, I tried to calm myself down. Jonathan, my best man, kept whispering stupid jokes and silly things in my ear to try to break the tension, and to get me to relax. It seems like a small silly thing to mention, but I really and truly thank him for what he did. It really really really did wonders to calm me down and help me regain focus.
Then the music began. The march in had now begun. At this point my nerves started to fray again, realising that the past few months of heartache and worry all culminated in this moment. That although we were officially registered as a married couple, in our hearts and minds this was still the moment that would unite us forever as husband and wife.
First down the aisle came Ally, our flower girl. Although I didn’t realise it at the time, it turned out that she was so excited she forgot to throw the petals on the ground! Next came Ericas best friend CR, followed by her sister Emily. The girls all looked truly gorgeous and it was amazing to see them walking down the aisle to the music. The moment was just so special, so powerful, so emotional.
I thought that I would be in total control of my emotions, the last thing I wanted to do was cry or tear. But seeing my bride walk down that aisle was just too overwhelming. I’ve seen her wearing that dress so many times before. When she had the dress made, when we had the photoshoot in Sydney, and all morning that same day. But seeing her walking down that aisle, on that road to destiny, was like seeing her for the first time. My eyes just welled up with tears, and I started to choke. I started straight up at the ceiling and tried to blink away the tears that were to come, to force them from rolling. It was right here again that my best man knew what he had to do, and started to repeat the stupid things that he had said previously to calm me down. And it worked. I gave a little laugh, sucked in a deep breath, and regained my composure.
Soon both the bride and her father had arrived at the final step, and Pastor Tan ask that whom was it that was to give up the bride. Her father put up his hand, and now it my time. I stepped towards them, shook her fathers hand, and took Ericas arm. Slowly we walked up the steps to stand finally on the stage.
We listened to Pastor Tan read out the order that I had prepared for him. The charge and the pledge. They were things that I had prepared myself, words that I felt expressed exactly to me what a marriage is and should forever be. Although I previously thought it long, it all just went by so quickly. And before I knew it, it was time for the vows. The vows that we had prepared ourselves which I will post separately
Reading the vows were the to me the most important part of the wedding. They were my promises to my wife, promises that I am making to her that I would forever intend to keep. To let her know that through the course of all the uncertainties of the future, all the ups and downs, these vows are the absolute foundation for what this marriage meant to me, and what I intended to build our future on. And so I wanted to get it right. I told myself that no matter what happens… do…not… cry!!! The last thing I wanted to do was choke and blubber through my vows. And so, at risk of sounding totally unromantic, right before reading my vows, I thought of monster trucks.
Yes… that’s right, monster trucks. Monster trucks crashing into each other and driving over cars. It was something just totally and absolutely random that just popped into my hear when I was clutching for just something to distract me from the highly charged emotions that were coursing through me. And it worked a treat
I read through my vows without the waterworks, and thankfully in reverse, initiated Ericas
Hearing Ericas reading our her heartfelt vows to me was music to my ears. Just hearing the emotion in her voice, feeling her love radiating through her words, and seeing her soul shining within her eyes was a moment that I’ll never forget. Not that I ever had any doubt, but right here right now, I just count myself as the luckiest person on Earth that I am someone whom Erica has seen fit to marry.
Now it was time for the rings. When Pastor Tan called for the rings, Nicholas, our ring boy, stepped up towards us with the ring pillow. Now I was so kanchiong, nervous, and eager that I actually picked up the wrong ring. I didn’t notice it until after I had handed the ring to the Pastor, he had prayed over it, and was handing it back to me to place on Ericas finger that I heard Erica whisper “Wrong ring!” I stared at the ring and realised that she was right! *slaps forehead*. I froze a little bit, then waited for the Pastor to finish speaking, before beckoning Nicholas to return again and then swapped the ring for the correct one. Argh…… I can’t believe I did that!
So I finally put the right ring on her finger, and thankfully most of the congregation were too far away to notice my little mistake, though unfortunately some still did! Erica then did the same, and put my ring on my finger in turn. And with that done, it was time for the lighting of the Unity Candle.
We stepped behind the table of which the candles were sitting. I lit my candle first, then lit Ericas with mine. Together we then lit the unity candle in unison, symbolising our lives coming together as one for now and forever. Once that was done, Pastor Tan said a prayer, and we both moved back to the front of the stage for the final part of the ceremony, the pronouncement.
Basically through all the ceremonial pomp that we’ve had to go through, this is what it was all for. For the Pastor to pronounce before god and to the world, that Erica was now officially, truly, and forever off the market. And that to all the guys out there in the universe, too bad for them but it’s all look but don’t touch for them from here on! And before we knew it, we were now pronounced husband and wife! Woohoo!! I may now kiss the bride! And kiss her I did!! Two or three times in fact!
And amidst all the clapping, we began the recession. Once the bridal party was out the church, the feeling of utter relief was overwhelming…. All the tears of angst and frustration were now tears of joy. It was all done, we were finally, officially, and technically married. We had a big round of group hugs, and Erica and I retired back to our private room to compose ourselves whilst everyone got started on the buffet tea selection on offer.
We both sat in the room just stoned out…. it was an incredible feeling. Not that we were actually married mind you, but that it was all over! All that stress and planning of the last few months culminating in the last 30mins! We just felt this huge sense of relief like a huge burden had been lifted. 15mins later, we returned to the reception to join our guests and spent the next 20mins or so chatting to everyone before it was time for the toast.
We got on stage and stood before the champagne fountain. A bottle was passed to us which we duly popped and began the pour. At which stage Ericas little niece sprinted up out of nowhere and stood right in front of the champagne fountain, getting in the way of the videographer and photographer!! Arghhhh…. Jamie!!!!! She didn’t budge or move for the whole pour, and as such I don’t think that there are any shots of us pouring the champers without her in the photo! I hope there is, but I don’t think so…. sigh… oh well… kids….
Glasses of champagne were passed by the waiter from the fountain to Erica, myself, and my friend Damian whom was the MC for the ceremony. Damian was visibly a tad nervous as I think it was a new experience for him, and he called for the attention of the guests for a toast. Now one nasty thing about Chijmes Chapel is the sound system. The acoustics of the place, to be perfectly blunt, is shit. It’s really… really…. shit. No one beyond the first 5 rows or so has any idea what the people on stage are saying. It’s quite awful as we found out later that not were many people unable to hear our the toast, but they also couldn’t really hear with any clarity much of the ceremony at all. So that was a tad disappointing.
So after the toast, it was time for a quick thank you speech. I just reeled off some words of appreciation for everyone whom could make it, trying to save the big speech for the wedding dinner. Which was a good thing anyway, because no one would have been able to hear a damn thing I was saying. I then passed the mic to Erica, whom managed to thank a couple of people before bursting into tears… no surprise really given the fact that she’s just a big softie
And so basically after the speeches were done, the ceremony was concluded. It was time to mingle, relax, and the guests could all leave if they wanted to. There were just so many people to meet and greet that we hardly got to talk to any of them. Before we knew it, it was getting quite late and people were all starting to leave. We figured that it was now or never for the bouquet toss.
Erica rallied up all the single women and gathered them at the base of the stage. It’s always quite obvious whom wants to catch the bouquet and who doesn’t. Emily especially, and a few of Ericas friends had the look of those which obviously would do anything NOT to catch the bouquet. You could quite easily tell from the nervous faces, the hands behind the back, the twitchy feet, and the general look of discomfort and unenthusiasm. However, this was more than made up for by a couple of people whom were obviously quite eager to be the catchers of the bouquet!
Once the bouquet was tossed, the latter girls started shuffling backwards away from it, whilst dieseldawn
basically did a swan dive/hail mary to catch the bouquet. If ever there was a person whom had a look that radiated the sheer fact that they were totally and utterly pleased with themselves, Dawn had that in spades, all over her face. She certainly had the look of a cat that had got into the cream…. and lets just say that P had a look on his face that I could only describe as…. awkward or uncomfortable pride?
And from there, we finally bid everyone farewell, and departed for our room at the Four Seasons hotel where we had RAMPANT HOT BRIDAL SEX!!!! HA! I’m married now, screw you political correctness!!! I’m finally living in sin no more, so I don’t need to be shy about saying it! (Though admittedly it’s never stopped me before!) HOT LUSTY WEDDING NIGHT SEX on the immensely comfy Four Seasons bed that will forever be immortalised in 0’s and 1’s, courtesy of the digital camera revolution! Woo!
Now thank god this post is finally done!