And today be my first ever Father’s Day. Father’s Day has never meant anything to me, nor Mother’s Day, nor Valentines Day even (V Day rant 1 and V Day rant 2 here). I’ve always considered this trifecta to be largely a marketing circle jerk, one that seems to be especially obvious and shameless. The only time I gave my mum a Mother’s Day gift was, I think, in the 5th grade when I bought some crappy token pressie from our primary school fair. I’m pretty sure that was the first and last time I did anything for the first two occasions. Valentines Day is simply an extension of that, one which I do try to celebrate for the main reason that I know it makes my girlfriends (and now wife) happy. Because girls like that kinda shit.
My parents aren’t the sentimental sort and as such would probably, and pragmatically, see any act that perpetuates these 2 thinly veiled excuses for a corporate windfall as a waste of money. Now all that being said, part of me did get a kick out of the knowledge that today is my first ever Father’s Day. Just like how Erica experienced her first ever Mother’s Day just 15 mins after Karissa was born.
What these 3 days do is simply celebrate, to me anyway, tokenism. The bare minimum. As I’ve mentioned in my V Day rants, I think every day should be Father’s, Mother’s, and Valentine’s Day. We should be treating our loved ones every day as if it were our last chance to do something special for them. To never take them for granted and to show them just how much they mean to us. Sure sometimes it’s hard as it’s in our very nature to expect the expected and take them for granted. However, just as we work to continuously improve, evolve, and develop ourselves in our professional lives, we should also do the same in our personal lives. People as a whole should strive to the point of actualisation and maturity such that we don’t need a flyer in our mail box to remind us to tell our Mother, Father, or partner just how much they mean to us. But instead, to remind ourselves every day, minute, or even second to do so.
Every day I look at my darling daughter, I experience the sheer joy and pride of Father’s Day… over and over again. Every moment I’m with my wife, it’s like Valentine’s Day is on constant repeat and I just want to do something to show her how much she means to me, however small. The most valued and priceless gift we can give to those we love is often that of which we have a limitless supply of. We just have to learn not only how to give, but also how to receive such gifts and recognise them for just how valuable they really are.
Sure it’s great to receive a fancy dinner or nice present one day a year, but I’d much rather be surprised with a hug from behind, my wife or daughter telling me she loves me, or even a sincere heartfelt “thank you”, every day of the year. As a father, my greatest wish is for my daughter to grow up showing me with action just how much I mean to her every day, instead of once a year. It may not be realistic, but it gives me the focus to try even harder to raise her right.
On that note, HAPPY FATHER’S DAY to all you Daddy’s out there, especially first timers!
P.S Erica took us to Mezza 9 to enjoy our first western buffet lunch in what seems like an eternity. Erica got to finally have oysters after 9 months of abstinence! I also managed to sneakily and quickly change K’s diaper right in my lap while having lunch! I had just gone to the toilets to change her, came back, and she soaked her diaper again 😛 I couldn’t be arsed going back to can for another change and thus I sneak changed out of sheer laziness. I’m pretty sure the success of this will result in many repeats of such sneak changes in dining establishments! Poop changes excluded of course.